Salem's Witch

1. To do a favor or service for; oblige. See synonyms at oblige.
   
2. To provide for; supply with.
   
3. To hold comfortably without crowding. See synonyms at contain.
   
4. To make suitable; adapt. See synonyms at adapt.
   
5. To allow for; consider.
   
6. To settle; reconcile.
   

The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition Copyright © 2007.

You love him, yes? So you (3) when he says he doesn't really want a relationship right now. You (4) because that's what you do best, and you'll do whatever it takes to stay in this. When he reminds you for the fourteenth time that he's called every temp and staffing agency thirty miles out from the city, and its not like he isn't trying,  you (5) and in the end, despite your best judgement, you (2) thinking that you are only doing what any good girlfriend would do for their guy. Especially a guy who loves you. When he lashes out at you in front of everyone about the bottle you dropped, or the eggs you burnt that morning, or the fact that you don't look like you did two years ago, you (6) and you tell yourself, he's right. I really do need to think more. Why can't I pay attention? Maybe I really am a klutz. And every time he asks you to do what you said you never would, that upset tone in his voice urges you to (1). You can't stop yourself. It feels natural. 

1. To perform a service or a courteous act for: favor, oblige. See help/harm/harmless.
2. To provide with often temporary lodging: bed (down), berth, bestow, billet, board, bunk,domicile, harbor, house, lodge, put up, quarter, room. See protection/exposure.
3. To have the room or capacity for: contain, hold. See full/empty/capacity.
4. To make or become suitable to a particular situation or use: acclimate, acclimatize, adapt,adjust, conform, fashion, fit, reconcile, square, suit, tailor. See change/persist.
5. To bring into, to conform.

Roget's II: The New Thesaurus, Third Edition by the Editors of the American Heritage® Dictionary Copyright © 1995.

Too many times you must (1) when you don't really feel like it. You (2) at first because its love, and later because you have the better apartment. Slowly, you (5). It is normal for you to have no time for anything else, anyone else. You have (4) over time so that you (3) everything that comes with this man you think you love. Because don't you love him? What would you be doing, otherwise?

We young women spend way too much of our time accommodating other people. Which, by the way, is the word that the above definitions and synonyms describe. I couldn't make it up if it weren't true. You see, its the womanly, feminine thing to do, accommodate. In Salem Village, back in 1692, those who weren't mothers, wives, or whores, were witches. It was so unnatural for a woman not to accommodate children, a man, or, well, many men, that you must be supernatural since you don't fit the molds. 

And while my mere presence does not trigger convulsions in the young, or generate the apparition of any yellow birds, I don't really think its so wrong not to accommodate. There is something to be said for being selfish when you realize that all the giving you've been doing hasn't really been well received at all. 

Give to yourself, first. Then not only will you better understand how to give to others, you'll understand who to give to in the first place. And for that matter, who not to give to. Because some people don't deserve our giving of ourselves. There's just no way to sugar coat it!

"The stereotypical witch is an independent adult woman who does not conform to the male idea of proper female behavior. She is assertive; she does not require or give love (though she may enchant); she does not nurture men or children, nor care for the weak. She has the power of words-- to defend herself or to curse."

(Larner, 273-4)

Well holy crap! I am Salem's witch!